mind over heart

hmmm... hidden entry... :P

i'm findin my actions damn contradicting... i've become rather conscious... n like hafta act here n there every now and then.... erm... not acting in the sense of being a hypocrite la.... it's not something bad.. doesn't affect any ppl except myself...

my problem: my mind wans me to act that way... but i actualli dislike it... i hate it infact... but my mind will reason somehow.. n ofcuz mind is stronger than the heart (scientifically, that's where it commands ur body!) ya.. shucks... haiz... reallie at a loss... dunno wat to do....

every action u do, will result in sorta a ripple effect back... or reflection or feedback watever way u wanna put it...
I dunno if what i'm receiving now is a feedback due to my current action or has totally no link... not that happi wif it... erm... it's not the worse... tho i think my mind has prepared for the worse but i reallie dun wan it! AHHHHHH~!
well, i juz hope if in any case, if what i'm receiving now is a feedback due to my "acting"... i hope it's juz a "pei4 he2" show... erM.... i.e. it's a understood action... aiyah.. sian